take
down those euro-nikkers, say posturing politicians!
Let’s outlaw fun. Meet the inspiring sight of
vested interests in Austria of all descriptions, scrambling for publicity
as Austria moves towards Euro-presidency.
“All the posters are on display throughout the Austrian capital
Vienna on 400 billboards until 24 January when they will be moved on
to Salzburg.”
—
“As part of an independent cultural project it is unclear whether
the posters can in fact be ordered removed.”
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#eu_nikkers_311205 |
advertising
disclaimer
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women...
“By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his sixth day of
working overtime.
An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time
on this one?"
“And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on
her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable
parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have
a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can
cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart -and she will do
everything with only two hands."
“The angel was astounded at the requirements.
"Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model?
That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."
“ "But I won't," the Lord protested. "I am so
close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She
already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hours a day."
“The angel moved closer and touched the woman. "But you
have made her so soft, Lord."
“ "She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have
also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
“ "Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.
“ The Lord, becoming irritable, replied, "Let me alone,
I'm busy. What d'you want? Bells on it?!" ”
Thanks to Charity [with mischevious alteration to original].
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#women_301205 |
annoying
the appeaceniks
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#appeaseniks_291205 |
it
has long been known that....
“ "It has long been known" ... I didn't look up the
original reference.
“ "A definite trend is evident" ... These data are
practically meaningless.
“ "While it has not been possible to provide definite answers
to the questions" ... An unsuccessful experiment but I still hope
to get it published. ”
And more.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#academic_flummery_271205 |
updated:
google’s
festive tails
Day 5
Feline and murine co-operation and ingenuity, unfolded in daily episodes.
All five images at provided link.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#google_241205 |
oh
the trauma of it!
“Desecrating a flag, the bill declares, "causes more than
pain and distress to the overwhelming majority of the American people
and may amount to . . . a direct threat to the . . . emotional well-being
of individuals at whom the threat is targeted.” [Quoted from newyorkmetro.com]
Hillary Clinton is “like a very earnest Vulcan who has closely
studied Earth politics”.
page
1 page
2
An interesting mix of “put the knife into
Hillary” and hard-boiled American political analysis. Another bit
of American culture now creeping stealthily towards the rest of the world.
recommended scan.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#us_flag_231205 |
muslim
barbie page
1 page
2
Fulla, the devout Muslim Barbie doll
“The Space Toon store in Damascus, Fulla's home town, gives a
whole section over to its local girl made good. The dolls are packaged
either as Fulla "with her outdoor fashion" — hijab and
coat combination, or full black chador — or as "indoor Fulla"
in trendy and often tight-fitting clothes that Barbie might be happy
to borrow. Both dolls are, in fact, of very similar size and construction,
and some are even manufactured by the same sub-contractor in China.”
Price: 100 shekels [$21].
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#fulla_barbie_231205 |
amazing
buildings of dubai
The Burj Al- Arab building, Dubai. Image credit:
funonthenet
Some
other building projects, mostly yet to be started, at Dubai.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#dubai_191205 |
the
mad revisionist strikes a new blow for lunacy
An excellent site applying the technology of
denialists to many unsupportable dogmas.
Discover the great moon hoax. Despite lying ‘scientists’
using old discredited techniques, it has been conclusively proven by expert
denialists that the moon most definitely does not exist.
All your questions answered; the moon hoax is examined
under various headings:
“What evidence do we have that there really is a moon?
“You can see it.
“ But don't all qualified scientists and astronomers agree that
there is a moon?
But who could or would perpetrate such a hoax?
What about that "moon landing" that took place in 1969, and
all of the subsequent "moon landings", as well as pictures
taken by satellites and telescopes?
But don't the astronauts who claim to have walked on the moon count
as eyewitnesses?
And what about the "moon rocks" that these astronauts brought
back with them?
Hasn't the moon been mentioned in texts and literature throughout history?
But what motive could someone have for falsifying the moon?
But the Moon was worshipped by the ancients, long before there was the
technology to create such a hoax.
What about references to the moon in the Bible?
The tides of the oceans are created by the gravitational pull of the
moon.
Okay, but I still find this all hard to believe. What evidence do you
have that there is no moon?”
And now you can discover that the Great Jewish
Hoax that has gone all undetected by ordinary gullible historians. The
researchers at the Mad Revisionist site have discovered that there are
no Jews and never were. The
arguments are revealed by a genuine secret
Jew.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#mad_revisionist_171205 |
| a
young democrat advertising her wares with subtlety and humour
For those unfamiliar with US political party symbols, the Republicans
have the elephant, the Democrats a donkey, sometimes known as an ass!.
Why?
In 1828, Democrat presidential candidate Andrew Jackson, running under
the slogan “Let the people rule”, was called “jackass”
by his opponents. Jackson turned this to his benefit, using a donkey on
his campaign posters. Later, in 1870, Harper's Weekly political cartoonist,
Thomas Nast, used the
donkey to represent Democrats. A few years later, in another cartoon,
Nast showed an
elephant as being the only animal not scared of the donkey in a lion’s
skin.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#ass_elephant_041205 |
sounds
of nature
dunes
“By comparing several singing dunes and two controlled experiments,
one in the laboratory and one in the field, we here demonstrate that
the frequency of the sound is the frequency of the relative motion of
the sand grains. The sound is produced because some moving grains synchronize
their motions. The existence of a velocity threshold in both experiments
further shows that this synchronization comes from an acoustic resonance
within the flowing layer: if the layer is large enough it creates a
resonance cavity in which grains self-synchronize.”
icebergs
sound like this!
Some
background text:
“Schlindwein believes that the iceberg tremors are caused by
water flowing through crevasses inside it. This flow occurs when an
iceberg bangs against the sea floor and slows down.
“The water inside keeps moving and the high pressure of the water
rushing through the tunnels sets their walls vibrating, producing regularly
spaced tremors. A similar mechanism could explain the signals from volcanoes,
Schlindwein suggests.”
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#sounds_281105 |
fold
it! [flash]
Full, fairly clear instructions.
A purist might moan about cutting and tape-use, but
the result is pretty and pretty good. No more twisting and wetting the
nose for the right weight balance is needed.
“Their plane, nicknamed Avenger, [...] won a competition set
by airline Jet2.com to design the ultimate paper plane.” [Quoted
in Yorkshire
Post]
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#paper_aeroplane_271105 |
rule
of law versus ‘art’ - put that feelthy fag out
“Lo Monaco was smoking, in line with the script, while playing
the main character on Sunday in Miller's "A View from the Bridge"
at a theatre in the northeastern city of Mestre, when a woman from the
audience shouted "Put out that cigarette".
“After a 15-minute suspension, the performance resumed with a
modified script and a non-smoking protagonist.”
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#feelthy_fags_161105 |
| rock
with jeezus on the shores of galilee
“With that in mind, the Israeli ministry of tourism has gone
public with a plan to build - in partnership primarily with American
Evangelical churches - a sprawling Holy Land Christian Center on the
northern shores of the Sea of Galilee, home to some of the most notable
chapters in Jesus' ministry. The center, to be built on approximately
125 acres that the Israeli government is offering free of cost, would
be a Christian theme park and visitors' center, one that would be particularly
attractive to Evangelicals and other Christians who want to spend more
time in the places where Jesus walked.
“Highlights may include a Holy Bible Garden, full of plants and
trees mentioned in the New Testament, and equipped with quiet sites
for reflection and prayer. A Sea of Galilee Amphitheater will overlook
the mouth of the Jordan River and hold 1,500-2,000 worshippers. And
the park will have a Christian Experience Auditorium and a Multimedia
Center. The center would also feature an online broadcast center, which
would give religious leaders an opportunity to address their followers
back home, live, near the tranquil blue waters of the Sea of Galilee
(which today is considered a lake).”
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#jesus_theme_park_121105 |
| google
uk celebrates armistice day 1918
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#google_armistice_111105 |
| rome
bans fish bowls - going round and round
“ "Rome stands out for recognizing that fish are interesting
individuals who deserve our respect and compassion every bit as much
as dogs and cats and other animals," said Karin Robertson, with
PETA's "Fish Empathy Project".”
—
“The northern city of Turin passed a law in April to fine pet
owners up to 500 euros ($598) if they do not walk their dogs at least
three times a day.”
At least, like Emperor Nero, modern Roman politicians
know what is more important than their population.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#fish_bowls_261005 |
| now
here’s an entrepreneur with the right attitude!
- sick and tired of socialists??
“Conservative Match offers much more than matchmaking, we bring
singles together for friendship, romance and marriage.”
—
“Sweethearts not bleeding hearts”
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#social_club_280905 |
| vatican
once more in the middle ages
“The Vatican is to ban all gay men from joining the clergy even
if they accept a vow of celibacy, reports say.”
In times gone by, when the Church of Rome was seeking
to judge annulment of marriage on the grounds of non-consumation, they
took the accused husband, had him drop his trews, and paraded naked ladies
in front of him to ‘test his reactions’.
Is this the return of such tests?
If the husband showed no ‘excitement’,
the annulment could go through.
Now, I guess they’ll be lifting the priest’s
frock and then banning them if they also do not show a reaction.
How the wheel it does turn.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#vatican_rag_260905 |
| france
to buy back louisiana
“ "This is indeed a smart move," commented Fox News
analyst Brit Hume. "Not only have we stopped the flooding in our
own budget, we've made money on the deal. Plus, when the god-awful French
are done fixing it up, we can easily invade and take it back again."
”
I look forward to more detailed reports from
the onion
and imao.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#french_louisiana_170905 |
| come
into my parlour, said the spider to the german lunatic
Now for a variant of the Darwin award, the Genghis
award - for wholesale destruction. Here is the first nominee.
“[...] she tried to kill spiders in a garage with a can of hairspray
and a cigarette lighter.
—
“Fire-fighters managed to extinguish the blaze and save the neighbouring
house, which sustained broken windows and some charring. The spokesman
estimated the total cost of the damage at well over 100,000 euros. No
one was hurt.
“ "The family have had to look for somewhere else to stay,"
he said. "The spiders are gone though – that problem was
solved." ”
Lead thanks to the
auroran sunset.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#spiders_160905 |
| humphries
applies for a post as official burnley nightclub comedian
“By and large, the politicians come on and I can understand
this, you can understand this, to deliver a particular message. Not
many of them are as blatant as Gordon [Brown] and if he doesn't get
his message across then he will offer you, - well what he does is, he
says at some point in the interview when he realises he hasn't got across
the prudence bit or whatever it happens to be.
“He will say 'I've got three points to make in answer to that
question, and then he will go one . . two . . three . . and by the third
point you're beginning to lose the will to live.”
Note:
- John Humphries has worked as a reporter and radio anchor man at the
BBC for many decades.
- Gordon Brown is the current UK Chancellor of the Exchequer/Finance
Minister.
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#humphries_080905 |
| lance
legstrong threatens france where it hurts
“But he's also spent the last two weeks angrily denying reports
by the French newspaper L'Equipe that said tests showed he used a performance-enhancing
blood booster in the 1999 tour.
“Armstrong first hinted of a comeback in an interview Monday
with the Austin American-Statesman. An Armstrong spokesman on Tuesday
said the comments were a joke, but within hours, the cyclist confirmed
it was possible.
“ "I'm thinking it's the best way," to anger the French,
he told the newspaper. "I'm exercising every day." ”
related material
the greatest
athelete in the world, as retirement beckons
the why and the how of lance armstrong,
champion cyclist
the web address for the item above is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2005_5.php#legstrong_080905 |
|  the
grand canyon - walking through time
“The Grand Canyon, one of America's best examples of the passing
of time, will start teaching its visitors about the meaning of millions
and billions of years. The South Rim of Arizona's natural wonder will
soon feature a "Trail of Time," by which hikers can walk 4.6
kilometers (nearly 3 miles) and see rock laid down at most geological
periods of Earth's history.”
“The current version of the exhibition includes the full scaled
trail of earth history (the 'Grand Canyon Trail of Time' and the 'Early
Earth Trail') as well as an expanded section that moves visitors through
a series of changing time/distance scales (the 'Canyon Trail') that
allows for a shift from the daily human perspective (years) to decades,
hundreds, thousands, hundreds of thousands, and finally to the almost-unimaginable
(!) 'illions'... millions of years [...]” [Quoted from epswww.unm.edu]
The newly opened Trail of Time and with the Skywalk,
opened in March 2007, are both on the South Rim of the Grand Canyon in
Arizona.
skywalk, grand canyon - update March 2007, previously
architecture
in the modern world
Skywalk structure run out to overhang the Grand
Canyon
Image credit: Destination
Grand Canyon
- opened: 20 March 2007 for VIPs, including Apollo astronaut Buzz Aldrin.
- open to the public: 28 March 2007
- opening times: dawn to dusk, mostly on first come, first serve basis
- price: $25 per person (plus Grand Canyon West entrance package cost)
- Skywalk construction: cantilever shaped glass walkway
- deck materials: three DuPont SentryGlas(R) Plus structural interlayers
and four layers of Saint-Gobain Diamant(R) low-iron glass
- glass weight: 90 tons
- glass thickness: 3 inches (some report up to 5 inches thickness)
- thin top glass layer replaceable to maintain scuff-free views
- two steel box beam supports
- eight concrete columns reinforced by cement and rebar
- deck secured by 108 “micro-piles” sunk 46 feet into rock
- structural beams: over 450 tonnes steel, including shock absorbers
that reduce bouncing from many people walking.
- deck projection beyond rim of the Grand Canyon: 70 feet, 10 feet wide
- height above the floor of the Grand Canyon: 4,000
feet, canyon floor visible through the ultra-clear glass walkway
- deck capacity: one hundred and twenty people
- deck strength: support approximately 100 pounds per square foot, able
to withstand 8.0 magnitude earthquake and 100 mph winds
- numbered shoe covers will be issued to each walkway visitor, to avoid
scratches and slipping
- Skywalk structure rollout, with the glass in place, was scheduled
for 27 February to 2 March 2007
- construction
images
- Skywalk facility to include 6,000 square-foot
visitor’s centre on three levels,
with museum, cinema, VIP lounge, gift shop, restaurants and bars
- cost: $20 million
- location: 3-hour drive from Las Vegas
- slideshow of Grand Canyon images part-way down this
linked page
Sketch map showing location of Skywalk. Image
credit: www.snopes.com
Glass-enclosed walkway proposed for the Grand Canyon.
Image credit: Destination
Grand Canyon
“As owners and protectors of one million acres of land throughout
the Grand Canyon's western rim, the Hualapai [Tribe]'s main goal is
to keep a balance between form, function and nature, while protecting
the tribe's culture and values, which are deeply engraved in the canyon
walls.
“The Skywalk will be the featured attraction once it opens to
the public in January 2006. Visitors will be able to walk around the
first-ever cantilever shaped glass bridge that will be suspended more
than 4,000 feet above the Colorado River and extend over the edge of
the Grand Canyon.”
related material
architectural
wonders and joys
The
Hoover Dam
Hoover
Dam Canyon Bridge or the Mike O'Callaghan-Pat Tilman Memorial
Bridge
|
