news archives
fun 2

topic archives: fun 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 III-2004: 03 08 08-2 22

london and the south-east by night
(link to image without animation at NASA, four times larger than the one below)

Hover mouse pointer over the image for labels of some landmarks. [Approximate labelling only.]

Image SS006-E-22939 courtesy of Earth Sciences and Image Analysis Laboratory,
NASA Johnson Space Center: http://eol.jsc.nasa.gov

[Original NASA lead from Limbic.
Animation produced by abelard.org © abelard.org, 2003. All rights reserved.]

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun030303

advertising
disclaimer

advertising
disclaimer

advertising
disclaimer

a keen worker

“A zealous traffic warden has been sent for "re-training" after putting a ticket on a bus as it picked up passengers at a bus stop.”

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun020303

i hate alfa romeos!

“An Italian woman has been arrested for allegedly vandalising 60 Alfa Romeo cars because they reminded her of her ex-lover.”

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun260203

selfishness incorporated—it’s my perfect right!

“One passenger helped bring the underground network to a standstill when she pulled a train's emergency cord after leaving her mobile phone at Victoria station.”
[lead from Limbic]

So selfish, it’s funny! Strange, the number of females with similar behaviour.
A (fictional) male version is Andy Capp. (See interesting sites for more.)

A fellow told me of how he once struggled home, carrying the shopping for his accompanying lady love, arrived at the front door, put all the bags down, got out his key, (she had a key in her bag, I asked him!) then unlocked the door and let her through. She marched through the door, and then shut it in his face. Nothing aggressive, just complete selfish thoughtlessness. Such is gallantry. I asked whether he got fed up with the lady, whom I knew he doted upon.
“Oh no”, he said, “I just couldn’t stop laughing!”
Yes, he eventually unlocked the door, took in the shopping and made her a cup of tea. Apparently her feet were tired.

About a year later she left him for another trade. Upset him, it did. Last time I met him, he was with a more considerate model. She even carries shopping and makes tea for him.

I wonder whether there is a moral to this story— don’t forget your mobile ’phone, perhaps?

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun150203

young man seeks very large female for serious relationship

Picture provided!

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun130203

everyone needs a hobby

Recommended reading for anyone who wishes to entirely waste some time.
If you have a portable, perhaps you could read it at your convenience.

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun300103

how not to take your dogs walkies

As is said on the telly, don’t try this at home.

And only banned from driving for a year—it sounds more like a straight-jacket job to me.

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun250103

someone who is good to know 20.01.2003

A competent site for an interesting fellow who is great fun, but not recommended to over-
sophisticated prunes.

Robert W. Service—the poet of the Yukon
He served in World War 1 and wrote of many things.

“I may be the only living writer to have made more than $1,000,000 out of writing verse.” [1956]

An index to his many collections of verse.

This from The Cremation of Sam McGee

There are strange things done in the midnight sun By the men who moil for gold; The Arctic trails have their secret tales That would make your blood run cold; The Northern Lights have seen queer sights, But the queerest they ever did see Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge I cremated Sam McGee *    *    * Some planks I tore from the cabin floor and I lit the boiler fire; Some coal I found that was lying around, and I heaped the fuel higher; The flames just soared, and the furnace roared such a blaze you seldom see, And I burrowed a hole in the glowing coal, and I stuffed in Sam McGee. Then I made a hike, for I didn't like to hear him sizzle so; And the heavens scowled, and the huskies howled, and the wind began to blow,

It was icy cold, but the hot sweat rolled down my cheeks, and I don't know why; And the greasy smoke in an inky cloak went streaking down the sky. I do not know how long in the snow I wrestled with grisly fear; But the stars came out and they danced about ere again I ventured near; I was sick with dread, but I bravely said, "I'll just take a peep inside. I guess he's cooked, and it's time I looked". Then the door I opened wide. And there sat Sam, looking cool and calm, in the heart of the furnace roar; And he wore a smile you could see a mile, and he said, "Please close that door. It's fine in here, but I greatly fear you'll let in the cold and storm- Since I left Plumtree, down in Tennessee, it's the first time I've been warm".

and now for something very sad... Dolls

She said: "I am too old to play With dolls," and put them all away, Into a box, one rainy day. I think she must have felt some pain, She looked so long into the rain, Then sighed: "I'll bring you out again; "For I'll have little children too, With sunny hair and eyes of blue And they will play and play with you. "And now good-bye, my pretty dears; There in the dark for years and years, Dream of your little mother's tears." Eglantine, Pierrot and Marie Claire, Topsy and Tiny and Teddy Bear, Side by side in the coffer there. Time went by; one day she kneeled By a wooden Cross in Flanders Field, And wept for the One the earth concealed; And made a vow she would never wed, But always be true to the deathless dead, Until the span of her life be sped. *    *    *    *    *    *    * More years went on and they made her wise By sickness and pain and sacrifice, With greying tresses and tired eyes. And then one evening of weary rain, She opened the old oak box again, And her heart was clutched with an ancient pain

For there in the quiet dark they lay, Just as they were when she put them away... O but it seemed like yesterday! Topsy and Tiny and Teddy Bear, Eglantine, Pierrot and Marie Claire, Ever so hopefully waiting there. But she looked at them through her blinding tears, And she said: "You've been patient, my pretty dears; You've waited and waited all these years. "I've broken a promise I made so true; But my heart, my darlings, is broken too: No little Mothers have I for you. "My hands are withered, my hair is grey; Yet just for a moment I'll try to play With you as I did that long dead day... "Ah no, I cannot. I try in vain . . . I stare and I stare into the rain . . . I'll put you back in your box again. "Bless you, darlings, perhaps one day, Some little Mother will find you and play, And once again you'll be glad and gay. "But when in the friendly dark I lie, No one will ever love you as I . . . . My little children . . . good-bye . . . good-bye."

Another example: The Ballad of the Ice-Worm Cocktail.

And there’s much much more!

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun200103

southern baptists? can you tell?
(thanks to the auroran sunset)

“Important Notice For Christian Parents”

“The new movie, The Two Towers makes up for its lack of on screen sex scenes with some of the most horrifying, blood wrenching violence ever to splatter the silver screen.”

More incredible sermons to keep you on the straight and narrow here.

Make sure you don’t end up burning in hell for ever!!

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun040103

t boone pickens sues god

“Pickens has lodged a formal complaint with the Judiciary Tribunal of NAFTA, charging Mother Nature with ‘dumping’ cheap rain” .

related material
running out of oil? no problem we'll mine texan water next

the web address for this article is
https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm#fun191202

19.12.2002

related material
running out of oil? no problem we'll mine texan water next

email email_abelard [at] abelard.org

© abelard, 2003, 4 january


all rights reserved

the address for this document is https://www.abelard.org/news/fun2.htm

varible words
prints as variable A4 pages (on my printer and set-up)